The Past | Thankful Thursday

The LORD impressed on my heart to carve out a section of my blog to share what I am thankful for. I started it on a Thursday and decided to call it "Thankful Thursday." Each week I share what I am thankful for. Come back each week so we can count our blessings together.

As I sit here in the final few hours of 2020, I am reflecting on how much our lives have changed in just two years! In many ways we are right back where we started. January 2021 will be two years since our family went on a 21 day fast and then God called me to a solitary fast for the final ten days of the month. He allowed me only water those last ten days and the clarity in the instructions was crystal clear! We were to sell most of everything we owned, uproot our lives, including our children's lives, leave family and friends, to move to a part of the country we never even knew existed before. God called us to Mobile, Alabama. He showed us the great need and we were able to help a lot of kids and impact a lot of lives, but we were forever changed. The real transformation was in our family unit.

In Indiana we fought a lot. We argued, we distanced ourselves (before that was a good thing), and we were drifting apart. I hated it and I just didn't know how to fix it. We would try to get back on track as a family, make each other a priority, but before we knew it, our busy schedules and hurried lives caused us to get back into the ruts of just existing with one another.

About a month ago God put in my husband's heart that He wanted us to move back to Indiana. Paul hesitated to tell me because he knew how much I loved living in Alabama. I didn't want to move back. The one person who drug their heels, cried a river of tears, went to the altar nearly every church service, and was reluctant to move to Alabama...was me! I didn't want to go. All my life I had said, "Send me Lord. I'll go!" And then when He said, "Go!" I was like, "You mean now? You mean us? To where, LORD? Are You sure? Did I hear right? You mean move...or like do a mission trip?" But finally my heart and will aligned with God's and I was so thankful for the opportunity. I loved Alabama. I loved the ocean and the sunshine and the climate.

The big transformation happened when we only had each other. We knew no one. We had no friends, no family, no jobs, no home, nothing! Well, we had God and we had one another. So we did things together. Paul and I were not working so we had a lot of time to work on our marriage. While the kids were in school, Paul and I would drive around Mobile and discover neat places to take the kids, fun things to do, and just did a lot of talking and driving. We connected in such a special way that we knew it was God. He literally breathed life back into our marriage. The joy was back. The peace was back. The true, deep love was welling up inside both of us. We smiled more. We looked at each other in the eyes more. We held each other more. It was wonderful! Nothing else was fighting for our attention. No jobs. No schedules. No deadlines. No other commitments. We were given the gift of time and we absolutely do not take that for granted. It was so incredible that our marriage changed and our family dynamics changed.

The kids grew a lot closer. They have always adored each other and I have always thanked God for that, but like any siblings they would argue and fuss and get on each other's nerves and then say or do things to hurt each other. In Alabama, they needed each other. They were different than the kids in their school. They did not grow up in the south and the culture was a big adjustment for these two. The food, the language, the communication, the atmosphere was just different than anything they experienced before. Yet, they learned so much more than lessons in school. They had opportunities to do and see things they never could have in Indiana. Kadesia excelled in school. She was in leadership roles, advanced in those, made friends, was respected by peers and faculty, and did not let the fact that she was different than anyone else in her class prevent her from putting her best foot forward.

We started out going to one church and then over the course of time we started going to a different church. It was wonderful. We loved it and we were so welcomed there. We were blessed and quickly began volunteering and using our gifts and callings for God. What a blessing to serve! Javan loves his youth leader. They remain in touch and he has made a lasting impact on Javan...and I believe the same is true in reverse. We said our sad goodbyes and hugged our friends from our church with sadness in our hearts...tears were shed but we know that God put us together for a reason and it was so clear why we needed to be there for each other.

I know Covid-19 played a part in many people's lives. I actually had Covid and it was absolutely awful but my case was not nearly as bad as others. God healed me and He continues to strengthen me. Even though I did get it, for the most part our lives didn't change much because of Covid. Thankfully we were not in a state that was heavily impacted and so our way of life didn't change that drastically. We were still able to do a lot of things we enjoyed. We could still go to the ocean, have cook outs, go to the park, take walks in the neighborhood. We enjoyed our time together and it strengthened us. It also gave us more time to connect with God and draw closer to Him.

So when God placed it on Paul's heart to move back to Indiana, he was a little reluctant to tell me. He sat down on the edge of the bed, facing away from me, and gave me the news. I think he was surprised because I agreed! God had been placing the same nudge in my heart. I didn't want to move again...get rid of more stuff, pack everything back up, have no home to go to, no jobs, no idea what we were doing but we prayed and prayed and prayed and God continued to reassure us that we had heard right. Every provision we needed fell into place. We had someone come and haul our stuff in one trip. Friends and family gave us money for fuel and food as we traveled. God even allowed our beloved Lola to find a home where she is spoiled rotten and loved on every single day!

We sure left a large part of our hearts in Alabama, but we know we are where we are supposed to be. I am thankful this Thursday for new beginnings, fresh starts, and for the past! I am thankful for the time to reflect on God's goodness and mercy through the years and I am so excited about the things He has put in our hearts to do for 2021. I can hardly wait to see where He takes Blue's Blessings. I am looking forward to when He helps me get my book published. I am eager to do the podcast, to sing the songs, to teach the lessons, to make the things, to write the curriculum, to be consistent with my blogs, to make the videos, and to grow closer and closer to Him as I journey closer and closer towards Home!

Sometimes the past can paralyze us. We get stuck. We don't want to stop reminiscing how good things used to be. We think of the relationship, the experience, the situation, the job, the success we have had and we don't move forward. It's fine to glance back to thank God for bringing us so far, but we can't camp there! We have a work to do in 2021 and we must keep going!

PHILIPPIANS 3:13-15 (13)Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, (14)I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. (15)Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you.

I am thankful for this blog so I can share my faith with others. I have had so many text messages, notes, and emails telling me how something I have shared has been a blessing to them and that is such an honor. It humbles me. I hope to always obey Christ and share what He wants me to here on this platform. Let me wish you all a safe and happy New Year! Welcome 2021 with prayer and obedience! If you choose to fast over the next 21 days I pray for strength and help to make it through and may you reap all the benefits of crucifying the flesh to strengthen the inner man! May God bless you and keep you! Hope you'll check back next year to see what I share tomorrow!

God bless you!

~Bridgett Owens

Relocating | Fuel For The Weekend

God told me to share my faith on Fridays and call it Fuel For The Weekend. I wanted to do it. I thought about it. I tried coming up with ideas on my own, but I just came up short, so I put the idea toward the back of my mind, but the Holy Spirit continued to nudge me in this direction. I am going for it and it's my desire that the posts I put up on Fridays will give you something to think about, ponder, consider, and reflect on throughout the weekend.

January 2019 God told me in my prayer time that my family and I would be moving to Alabama. I was shocked! I did not want to go to Alabama, let alone live there. I was hoping I heard wrong. Again, in January 2019 during a time of prayer and fasting I heard God clearly tell me that He was sending us to Mobile, Alabama. I was scared and worried. I wanted details...where would we live, what schools would our children enroll in..where would we go to church...what about our jobs --we both had been promoted and received raises....what job would we have in Alabama? I spent the next seven months praying and fasting and going to the altar a LOT and I learned to TRUST that God would see us through....and He did!

November 2020 God spoke to my husband and said we were moving back to Indiana. He came into the bedroom. I was laying on the bed, sick with Covid, and he sat on the edge of the bed away from me as he shared what God told him. I never wanted to move back to Indiana. I love the ocean and I have made friends here. I enjoy going to Harvest Church and getting hugs from Gwen and serving the youth. As I listened to my husband share what God had said I felt complete peace and acceptance. I knew he was right. I still didn't want to go. I prayed and God has confirmed over and over through various people and circumstances that we are definitely supposed to move back to Indiana. I know some of the reasons He is sending us back. Some things I cannot share but it is for a purpose that we must leave our home in Alabama and relocate to Indiana.

When I shared the news a lot of people asked us why we are moving back. At first I was surprised at the reaction, but God began to reveal the reason people want to know. Many saw us move in great faith and with no answers as to where we would even sleep that night. They expected something monumental to happen when we came to Alabama. I am not sure exactly what they were expecting, but God did some monumental things, just not the way others might think.

In Indiana we were four people with the same address but that was about it. We ate most meals in a drive-thru and lived in our cars more than our home. We were constantly on-the-go in a mad-dash to go from one activity to another, one event to another. Paul worked long hours, his commute was one hour and fifteen minutes one way, and often he was up before the light of day and did not get home until long after the sun set. I had to shoulder the brunt of raising our children and keeping things going. I suffered from severe clinical depression and it was a very dark period in my life. The kids were active in sports and our church and had friends to spend time with. Even going to church we often took three different vehicles. We loved each other but we were not invested in each other the way we are now.

In Alabama we are four people with the same address and so much more. Now we eat most meals at home. We do not go many places and not just because of Covid. Paul does not have to go in early at all and so mornings with Dad are a real thing! The kids enjoy having him home with them more. Paul works about 15 minutes from the house and we are able to bring him a drink or lunch whenever we want. He gets home from work and talks with us, helps with supper, or throws in a load of laundry. He leads our family as God is leading him and that is more of a blessing than anything I can think of. On Sunday nights our church doesn't have service so we gather in the master bedroom. I play the keyboard and we sing a couple of songs. We each share what God has done for us that week and we share prayer requests. After we pray, Paul opens the Bible and teaches us God's Word. It's a beautiful thing that would never have happened staying in Indiana.

In Alabama we are blessed to travel to beautiful places and see the ocean, sailboats, city lights:

We are so close to a beautiful beach in Mississippi:

We are close to Pensacola, Florida where Javan had a fun birthday celebration last year:

We are close to Destin, Florida where Javan had a fun birthday celebration this year:

And there's so many fun things to do here in Mobile. All of us have had amazing opportunities to do things we never would have been able to in Indiana. I don't regret the move to Alabama. I am sad that the stay is so short and I feel very sad to leave the ocean!!! But God created the oceans and He brought me here this time, so He can always take me to visit again! I will go back to Indiana in obedience to God. We all are willing to go back but it's different this time. We are changed. We are connected. We are stronger. We are united. And it's going to be interesting to see if Indiana tries to change that.

Surrounded by family and friends, settling into a routine like before, will we value each other like we do now? It's easy to say, "Of course!" But will we? We gathered together for a family talk like we do sometimes and we shared our feelings on some of the reservations we have about moving back. We are willing to do what God asks of us, but we want to do so with joy in our hearts and not just obey but with dread. So we talked about the things we didn't want to happen to us as a family when we go back and it got a little crazy and emotions were all over the place, but it was a good talk! In the end we all agreed to be committed to each other and to seek God first and just keep doing what we are doing here. We ended in prayer and asked God to help us stay focused on what matters.

We are going to go back to the familiar in a lot of ways, but we are stronger now. We are trusting God. We are walking in His statutes, His paths, and His ways. We have our eyes on Him and we desire to get closer and closer. There are some things about Indiana that we miss: things like Aldi, camping, Spring Mill, El Rancho del Burrito, MOMS in Prayer, and many people including our family and friends. There are many things that we will miss about Alabama like the freedom, the ocean, the easier stride of life, and the solidarity we have found in being together. I will miss my little MOMS in Prayer group here. Hopefully we can take some of that with us to Indiana.

I have become a stronger nurse. I see things a lot differently now. I have a greater appreciation for the homeless and the mentally ill, even though they have always been a big piece of my heart. God allowed me to work with doctors and therapists who literally taught me so much about the way the brain works and things that alter that and how situations and experiences shape the neuro pathways of the brain and it has been so GOOD to learn this. It has helped me professionally and personally. I have worked with kids and teens in psychiatric crises and I have loved them and poured my heart and soul into giving them stability and care and structure. I have had the privilege of working with adults who are not able to function in society right now and then to see them work through these processes and with the right medication and therapies they can actually leave the facility and be productive members of society...it's just good! I see how some don't get better and sometimes get worse and sometimes they leave the facility and they come right back, and other times you hear of the tragedies as they become another statistic. It has shaped me into a different person. I have even more compassion now as I understand things more.

I have connected with individuals here in Alabama that I will dearly miss. I have friends who feel like extensions of my family. I have had some really bad, hard days here. I have had some sad, cry my heart out days here. And mostly I have some really great, fun, happy times here. I have laughed so hard I cried. I have danced. I have been silly. I have made great memories with our family. It's funny because I grew up in Indiana and I always wished there was a way for time to slow down, for the spinning-out-of-control merry-go-round of life to just stop so I could get off and catch my breath.... and then God lets me do just that. I feel like the last 16 months of my life has been about slowing us down and helping us all get off the dizzying ride of life and just breathe.

God has done some BIG things for us and through us here in Alabama. To God be all the glory! But the greatest blessing of all is that He never left us for one moment. He has guided every step of this journey and He is guiding us back home to Indiana and this time I pray that as we pack our belongings we don't forget to pack the lessons He has taught us so we can go back and do even more for God's glory to further His Kingdom.

Before the year's end we will once again head north to Indiana and work to build a life God would be proud of, that would honor Him. We desire your prayers and ask for protection and provision that we know He will provide. If God has put something in your heart that doesn't make sense to you, or is hard for you to even want to do, just trust Him. He only wants the best for us and He has a marvelous plan laid out. I hope this verse encourages you!

2 CORINTHIANS 12:9-10 (9)And He said unto me, "My grace is sufficient for thee: for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of God may rest upon me. (10)Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.

God's strength is perfect! He gives us His joy and that gives us strength! We can do all things through Christ who gives us strength. Even if the thing is uprooting and moving again. Even if it is going to someone and talking to them about the LORD and you're not sure how they will respond. Even if the thing is hard, or scary, or feels impossible! God will give you the resources you need. Just hold on and stay strong!!

If you have a need that you want me to pray about with you, please feel free to email me. If you want to share it in the comments so others can pray with you, too, that is fine also. God wants to help you! You were never instructed to go alone! God is always with us and we pull strength from the source that never runs out!

I hope something I have said today has given you strength for your journey and light for your way! Have a wonderful weekend! God bless you!

~Bridgett Owens