Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Proverbs 22:6 KJV
Do we believe God's Word is true? Do we stand on the Word of God and claim all of the promises in the Bible for ourselves? If so, what do we do when we face a scripture like this one and the circumstances of our lives seem to contradict the passage? Do we get confused? The Bible is true. It is God's Word and He cannot lie. This promise is for you! If you have children in your care, this is YOUR promise. Stand on it and believe it, even if it looks like it is not your reality.
So let's look at this scripture closer. The first part of this verse is a command. We are to train our children in the way they should go. How does one go about training a child? We train children for lots of things, but one of the most common is potty training. After countless diaper changes, the time eventually comes when most children are ready to be potty trained.
The task seemed so daunting when I was potty training my daughter. She had great verbal skills and good understanding of instructions, yet it was difficult for me to know how to get the message across that if she felt the need to potty, she should tell me. She said, "What does it feel like?" I was not sure how to describe that. I did the best I could. We tried different strategies. We messed up. We learned from our mistakes. We extended grace to one another as we struggled through the process. I learned as much, if not more, than she did. I learned patience. I learned how important consistency and routines are. I learned that it was important to cheer her on and encourage even the smallest efforts. I learned that I take a lot of things for granted. I learned to look at the task through the eyes of a child. Suddenly the toilet looked big and intimidating, even scary. The noisy flush. The water rushing out of the bowl and the curious look on my daughter's face as she said, "Where did it go?"
In the midst of teaching hand hygiene, personal hygiene, and the mechanics of all things "potty," we were both learning and growing together. Now my daughter is almost 18 years old. She has not needed her mommy to help her potty in many, many years. The days of hurriedly carrying her to the bathroom as she loudly exclaimed, "I gotta go! I gotta go!," are now a distant memory. The stress and frustration are all gone. The hard time of that season has been replaced over and over with many other training sessions as she has grown and changed through the years.
The verse in Proverbs is a process. Marathon runners do not practice one day and then they are done. They do not train for one race and that's all they ever do. They do not purchase running shoes one day and the next sprint through their first race with no other training or preparation. Similarly, we cannot expect to train our children in one aspect of life and expect good results. No, we are to consistently teach our child, or children, the skills they need to survive and thrive in life. We are to come alongside them and teach them about love, mercy, grace, and forgiveness. We are to train them in the way they should go, regardless of the season they are in.
The promise in this verse is that when they are old they will not depart. This does not guarantee your child will never grow up and rebel. It does not mean that all the things you have taught them won't seem to have fallen on deaf ears. The promise is that what you have taught them will not leave them. This is true whether the training is good or bad. The things you teach your child will stick with them. Those who go on and live a lifestyle that contradicts the way they were raised, is not proof this scripture is invalid. No, often these kids will tell you they knew they were not making good choices but they chose to do it anyway.
The promise is that those lessons are still there. The promise is that the Holy Spirit will continue to work on their hearts if we have shared Him with them as children. It's hard work to be a good parent, but we are not ever commissioned to be perfect parents. We are told to be consistent coaches, helping to train these children through every season, just like our Heavenly Father does with us.
If you are a mom or dad, new to this journey, or a seasoned veteran, take heart in knowing God sees your efforts. Ask Him to lead and guide you in every area of your life. Give this season of training your children to God and He will give you wisdom and understanding. Give the same grace, forgiveness, mercy, and unconditional love that He gives to us. Mirror His parenting skills as best you can and I promise you will see this verse become true in the lives of your children.
If you have wayward children, never give up on them. God is long-suffering with us and we are to be the same with them. Pray for them every single day. Show that child the love of the Heavenly Father. Do not allow roots of bitterness to grow in your heart. Do not blame them. Do not blame yourself. Do not become discouraged. God sees the need and He wants them to be a part of His family even more than you desire it. Trust Him to see you through this journey and invite Him to take over the training session. He will teach you and your child more than you can imagine.
If you long to have a relationship with your Heavenly Father, you can! Just go to Him with faith and confess that you are a sinner in need of a savior. Acknowledge that Jesus is the Son of God and He died for your sins. Accept Him as Lord of your life and He will come into your life. He will change you and you will never be the same again! You will never find a greater friend to do life with!
If you know someone who is struggling in this season of their parenting, encourage them. Share this verse with them. Invite them to check out this blog post. Offer to help with an area they may be struggling if you can. It is a hard job to be a parent, but thankfully we have a really great example in the greatest parent in the world: God.
I hope something I have shared today has given you strength for the journey and light for your way! God bless you!
~Bridgett Owens
